Ikea idea.

I've been to Ikea few times, and I refuse to shop there because of the stupid fucking rat maze design they have going on.  I flat refuse to trudge through an incredibly long formaldehyde laced glue bound wood maze while following "exit" signs that are only designed to confuse and piss you off.

I have a solution.

As a Libertarian I don't like government regulation, so I don't want a law passed or an injunction against a crappy floor layout.  Instead I want to bring an entire bus load of autistic people of various ages, drop them off at the entrance and tell them we have pizza and ice cream waiting for them, all they have to do is walk through the store, come down the stairs at the end and it will be waiting near the registers, and they need to there within ten minutes because we're going to assume they don't want any if they take that long to make it down.

When the minions working the floors report a bus load of autistic fits in the store to the  lesser demons who work the floors call police and ambulances etc.. the lesser demons who run the place are going to have to explain why they have a floor layout that causes autistic fits.

In the end, everyone wins (except the demon masters), the customers of the store will eventually lose the maze, the lesser demons will have an easier job, and the autistic folks will eventually get their pizza and ice cream.

Win Win!

I've been working entirely too much lately.

Seriously, I can't get enough sleep in, I got a day off a few days back and I wound up sleeping for 12 hours straight.  I'm not one of those lay in bed all day types, I was just exhausted.

Ever get to the point your muscles just don't seem to recover?  Yeah, that's where I was.

Lung congestion awesomeness!

So during the cold I had lung congestion, which is basically defined as massive quantities of snot collecting in the lungs.  I took some Mucinex to break it up, then I coughed up at least a shot glass full all in one hack, which I proceeded to spit full on onto the branches of a bush.  That made the nastiest/coolest hanging snotcicle I have ever seen!

Pissed myself.

Not the "couldn't contain myself so I let it go" pissed myself, but the whole male anatomy it can happen pissed myself.

I drove for quite a few hours straight, and I half needed to pee, but not really really bad.  I went to a public restroom, and I did my business, about a gallon, shook it a fourth time just so I knew I was playing with it, and tucked it back in my pants.

In come the intricacies of the male anatomy, something about the relaxing, the having already pissed etc... kicked in, and I let lose about another four of five ounces without even knowing I was doing it.  I was some sort of combination of driving, the getting out of the drivers seat, getting moving again, I'm not sure what it was, but it's not something I do on a regular basis, and I was still quite a way from home.  Not only that, I met with one of the upper Low Men before I could change pants.  Then, while I was in the area I met with a member of my Ka-tet  I hadn't seen in quite some time while trying to pass it off as sink splash.

I'm too damned old for this, yet not old enough at the same time.
FML

I'll be more careful after road trips from now on.